First Father's Day Without My Daddy

June 21, 2015

10:18PM

Boy, was I happy for summer to come, but I feel like now I have too much ideal time.

I haven't given myself time to heal.

I have been keeping myself pretty busy.

I worked overtime to stay busy, so I wouldn't have to accept the fact that today is Father's Day.

That didn't work out too well for me.

At times, I feel rude because it's difficult to acknowledge it for others.

It reminds me of you, not that it's a bad thing; but it is not something I am ready for in front of people.

I do not want people to see me when I am weak.

I am always the strong one.

But at the same time, I feel like I have hit my limit in being strong.

This is going to be one of my most challenging summers I've had in a long time.

I know my birthday will be the next most difficult day.

I see people posting pictures with their daddy's and it is tearing me up inside.

This is the weekend which means the time when we chat.

I know we would have spent a good hour or two on the phone just talking about absolutely nothing and everything at the same time.

You have always been there for me, loved me, supported me, and been my number 1

cheerleader.

Thank you for being there even when times were hard for you too.

You never let it be known you were struggling or needed help.

I was never a greedy child, and people came to you for help.

Even if it put you in a small bind.

That just going to show how big your heart was.

You had good karma, I know you got it from Nana!

I'm hanging in there.

Love you too!

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